How to Waste a Week in Vientiane

BONKY- Reading any guidebook, blog post or travel itinerary, it becomes clear that staying a week in the modest capital city of Laos does not come highly recommended. While undoubtedly pleasant, Vientiane’s main attractions can be conquered in one action-packed day, leading the small riverside city to act mostly as a stop to apply for visas before rushing off to the limestone mountains in the north or the lazy beaches in the south. So why did Smonk choose to stay for a whole week?

That choice can be attributed to our insidiously growing fear of Laos transportation that has slowly accumulated with each steep cliff we nearly topple off of. For those closely reading this blog, you may have caught the (not so) subtle motif of mentioning scary bus trips – really, the tip of the iceberg that is our trepidation. Between riding in a minivan where the seats were hardly attached to the floor and having a bus driver stop on the side of a mountain to cool off his steaming hot brakes using a crumpled half-filled water bottle, we were sufficiently dreading future voyages by the time we got to Vientiane. Along with waiting for our Vietnam visas to be released before our flight to Hanoi the following week, settling in the city became the obvious plan.

In a incredible turn of events Smoth decided to take fully control of the itinerary, patiently crafting an exciting several days around the city -most of which we followed. While we never got around to going bowling or singing karaoke, his thorough research allowed us to fill our days without growing bored.

The first thing to know about Vientiane is that its a quickly growing city. Plastered around empty lots and new buildings in the city centre are grand plans for skyscrapers and shopping malls. Even crossing the street proved a challenge comparable to busy area of Thailand – something we had to readjust to after growing accustom to the slower pace of the north. Attracting both new businesses and a rising number of expats meant there is easy access to delicious international cuisine.

Truthfully, most of our week here was spent savoring crispy French style pan-fried fish, guiltily giving in to a bacon cheeseburger and fries, and ordering-in perfectly baked four-cheese Italian pizza. Of course our Western indulgences were balanced with yummy Lao dishes whose highlights were fresh vegetable and tofu spring rolls with lime and mango sauce, pumpkin chicken curry, and a mango and sticky rice pancake.

While our modest budget has banished a trip to Paris to future, hopefully wealthier, times, Vientiane is surprisingly a reasonable alternative for a backpacking budget. Lazy afternoons are best filled strolling along the streets, shaded under lines of trees, passing beautiful buildings and dropping into any one of the cute coffee shops for a coffee and croissant.

You can even get a good view of the city by making a climb up the Patuxai Monument, a war monument similar to the Arc de Triumphe, which was built (mostly) in the 1960s after the Americans gave the Lao government funds to build a new airport and they decided to build Patuxai, the “vertical runway”, instead. To cap off our “Parisian” experience we even saw a French film at the city’s French institute, seemingly one of the few places in Laos to watch a movie on the big screen.

Looking back at Vientiane from our hostel in Hanoi, where blaring horns and echoing radio broadcasts sound a little too loudly to fall comfortably in the background, Laos’ largest city seems completely tame in comparison. Laos as a whole, while a short drive or flight away, seems like a different planet, one which has managed to evade the massive commercial development of its neighbors for the time being.  But as we contemplate navigating Hanoi’s impossible streets, dodging numerous scams and surviving an overnight train to trek in the mountains tomorrow, our simple week in Vientiane is a pleasant but distant memory.

 

 

Ancient artifacts and Unexploded Ordinances at Laos’ Plain of Jars

SMOTH – It takes a lot of motivation to convince Bonky and I to board a tiny bus for a seven hour trip careening through the mountains. But when we were afforded the chance to see 3000 year old megalithic monuments, combined with a countryside ravaged by the most intense aerial bombing in history, we leapt at the chance.

Just outside of the small town of Phonsavan in Northeast Laos, lies ‘The Plain of Jars’, which consists of several different sites, kilometers apart, upon which are scattered massive and ancient stone “jars”. No one knows for certain who put the jars there or why. No trace remains of the civilization that constructed them almost 3000 years ago. Laos legend states they were massive whiskey urns created to celebrate a King’s victory in battle, while Archeologists suggest that the jars were used in family burial rituals. What is certain, however, is that these jars, some almost two meters tall, were laboriously crafted and transported, and provide a real historical interest.

Jars at Site 3

Jars at Site 2

An intact example

A jar lid

Further adding to the intrigue of this location are the war artifacts and craters left from “The Secret War,” a period of several years in the late sixties and early seventies where the USA pummeled Laos with over 2 million tons of bombs, up to 30% of which failed to explode on impact. These unexploded bombs remain incredibly dangerous for the Laos people, 12,000 of whom have been killed by the Unexploded Ordinances (UXO) since the end of the war.

Bonky and I opted to book an official, private tour through our guesthouse, to take us to the three safe Plain of Jars sites (having been cleared of UXO), some remnants of the war including a tank husk, and to a small village which made its own rice whiskey. It was way out of our normal budget, but thanks to a lovely birthday gift from my parents, we were able to indulge and get the full tour experience.

Our guide was great, simultaneously juggling archeology, Lao legend, and war history. We went to see a discombobulated Russian tank from the war, stripped of its useful parts by industrious farmers. He also told us some devastating stories about how the locals would dig up craters for scrap metal from the bombs, but sometimes the would hit a still unexploded piece, and many people would die. These craters were distinguishable by having a distinct smaller crater within the much larger space. Scrap metal continues to be dug up today, and is used in the making of crafts, jewelry and spoons.

Sign at a crater

An enormous crater where many people died digging for scrap

Another crater

Bottle opener made from high-grade aluminum reforged from bomb shrapnel

The tank

Oh hey there.

Luckily, a team of bomb disposal experts is slowly clearing the Laos countryside of UXO’s, digging them up and detonating them safely. In fact, as Bonky and I browsed through the jars, we heard a loud explosion in the distance, which our guide informed us was just the bomb disposal team taking care of business.

The jars themselves were magnificent. It was truly awe inspiring to imagine what sort of motivation it must have taken for a relatively primitive people to construct such enormous artifacts. Because the sites are very minimally regulated, we were able to interact with them, run our hands over the millennia old carving, even step inside a collapsed one for a photo op suggested by our guide. It was a rare and wonderful experience, something I will always remember fondly.

Walking through rice fields to Site 3

A carving on the side of a jar

To cap of our day, we drove to a little shack where an elderly woman distilled some incredibly potent rice whiskey, which Laos people generally save for special occasions. Our guide introduced us to the incredibly friendly distiller who offered me some. I steeled myself for something brutal and took a shot. It was actually pretty damn good, although it kicked like a mule. Even Bonky tried a sliver of it, and found it to be tolerable. When I was offered a second shot, I accepted without hesitation and rode back to our guesthouse feeling rather warm and content.

Tools of the trade

Undoubtedly, visiting The Plain of Jars will be a highlight of my trip. With it’s blending of contemporary and ancient history, it’s beautiful landscape, and even a couple of whiskey shots, I’d say it was worth the seven hours spent in a sardine can-cum-rollercoaster of a bus.

A Luxurious Birthday in Luang Prabang

BONKY – If bad things really do come in threes, following the jungle trek that almost killed us, an excruciating three hour songthaew ride (doubling as a dried fish delivery truck) to Pai and coming down with a debilitating illness completed the trio. While coming back to Chiang Mai for a few days helped us to recover in comfort, aside from going to see How to Train your Dragon 2 at the movie theatre down the street, we were tortured by our proximity to an overwhelming amount of trendy cafés, interesting restaurants and lively bars that our sickness would not allow us to indulge in.

Therefore, when our journey to the beautiful Luang Prabang aligned with the return of our health and Smoth’s 23rd birthday, we decided to break the budget a little to experience the more luxurious side of traveling. A UNESCO World Heritage city, this former capital of Laos, drawing mobs of tourists with it’s well-preserved European architecture from its french colonial days intermingling with ancient Lao temples and picturesque natural beauty, is the perfect location to experience the finer things.

 

Instead of waking up in our usual ant-infested guest house, Smonk chose to spend the day at My Dream Boutique Resort, a charming hotel overlooking the Nam Khan River. Along with bamboo reading huts in the garden, a small swimming pool to sip cocktails by and a staff who folds all your clothes every time you left the room, our hotel rooms even had a shower that was separate from the toilet area (trust me, a big deal in Asia). In the morning we rose from our large comfy bed, gazed over the balcony at the stunning greenery that surrounded us, and head downstairs to get some free breakfast from the comprehensive breakfast buffet. With a little extra money to spend, it is no surprise that this day was all about food (…and of course Smoth’s birthday…).

After filling our faces with free noodles, croissants, eggs and muffins, Smoth and I took some bicycles into the main part of town to a restaurant called Tamarind. Marketed as an upscale introduction to Lao cuisine, Tamarind serves a range of unique dishes including purple sticky rice and local fish steamed in banana leaf. As novices to the Lao palette, we opted for a taster platter of Lao dips, eaten by soaking a ball of sticky rice into the diverse dishes of smoked eggplant, spicy buffalo skin, fresh salsa and salty Lao river weed. This starter was followed by barbecued pork wrapped in lemon grass, which was washed down by a tart ginger and lime refresher (for me) and a particularly minty mojito (for Smoth). For dessert we decided on a coconut and egg custard set in a slice of baked pumpkin – a dish that ensured we would not be hungry again for a long time…

…Which happened to be unfortunate because we had reservations at The Balcony, a newly opened restaurant whose specialty is French-Lao fusion dishes and also acts as a training ground for Lao people looking to work in the hospitality industry. We felt like royalty when our “carriage” (aka the free restaurant shuttle) arrived in front of our resort to whisk us away to our dinner. After being seated by a friendly staff, Smoth and I contemplated a small but thoughtful menu.

The amuse bouche was a mystery dish that appeared to be two crouton-esque bread sticks with a cracked-cream-filled quail egg on top of a mountain of crunchy chocolate cookie crumbs. Following this unique but tasty concoction was the meal Smonk had been waiting for – risotto! A rare dish to find on a continent with so much rice, risotto is definitely something we have been missing from back home. This risotto did not disappoint with its fresh green onions and tiny Lao mushrooms, accompanied by a glass of mango sangria. It broke my heart to have to leave some on the plate to make room for tender braised beef cheeks with purée mashed potatoes and pounded rice.

At this point I was severely pushing the limits of my stomach when the restaurant brought a beautiful chocolate birthday cake topped with a creamy vanilla icing and tiny lemon chips, and guarded by two carefully crafted apple swans. Despite being full, Smonk put an impressive dent in that cake a little two quickly… especially since a final dessert had yet to come.

Ten minutes later the waiter brought out an incredible finale, which I can only describe as being a selection of the most delicious sweet flavours on the planet. Two balls of dense Irish crème chocolate, decadent white chocolate mousse, smooth vanilla bean ice cream, thick caramel and chocolate sauce…This is only the vaguest of descriptions because if the  birthday cake had gotten me food tipsy, this dish took me all the way to food drunk. I asked Smoth if it would be okay if I lay my head on the table for a few minutes as I endured the extreme pain I had inflicted on my digestive system, but he said that would be inappropriate.

Somehow I managed to make it back to My Dream without falling over and having a family of chickens peck out my eyes, but the coconut and carrot cake we had bought earlier that day had to be set aside for a later date. Actually that date was the following day when we took a frightening six hour bus ride in a vehicle that seemed to be more random pieces of rusting scrap metal than bus. Sadly for Smoth, when his birthday was over… it was really over. But probably for the best. While Smonk learned that our taste is certainly of the champagne variety, being on a strict budget forces you to experience a side of a country off the well-groomed tourist path readily available at first glance.